The Question Everyone Wants to Ask but is Afraid Too
First off, I must thank you guys for the continued support of this blog. It means the world to me. Second off, I’m writing this blog because several people have asked me that they are curious about the issue. There are multiple types of disabilities but they can be categorized in two ways: disabilities developed at birth or disabilities encountered later in life. My one friend who works with the disabled population indicated to me that this is a hot topic for debate and also got me thinking. I have a family member who is going through similar issues at this point in their life.
I myself was born with a disability. I have Cerebral Palsy and it is a neuromuscular disability. It is basically like I have the ability to do everything but my brain does not know how to send the signals to the appropriate muscle groups. Due to my circumstance, I have had a long while to adapt to challenges and I have never known what it’s like to walk, even without the assistance of a walker or another person. I have never known what it’s like to work out like an able-bodied person and come home and feel exhausted. I have never even known the simplest pleasures in life such as being able to tie my own shoe. However, this does not bother me because I don’t know what I am missing. I cannot speak for others but in my opinion, it is better to have a disability which limits your functioning from birth rather than experiences both sides of life. I say I cannot speak from personal experiences however I do have friends that have undergone this predicament. I find that these individuals can be categorized into two types of people.
When one has their physical independence suddenly taken away from them it is no doubt mentally training and frustrating. I cannot imagine how my one friend felt when they were just about to go to school for diving and then the next thing they know they found themselves in a wheelchair. They have adapted greatly to their new circumstance and they do not feel society owes them anything because they are not disabled. I know others that never come out of what I have terms “the grievance period.” As I’ve stated many times on this blog before. I go to a college which has a high incidence of people I wheelchairs. The number of people in wheelchairs is equally split among people that have had their disabilities since birth and people that have grown into their disabilities.
Apart from accidents, the most common form of “growing into one” disability is an umbrella of 40 disabilities known as Muscular Dystrophy. There are several common forms of MD but most show themselves during the heart of adolescence. MD itself is a genetic disorder that is not controlled by the birthing process. These individuals are not often cut down at their prime. When social development is extremely fragile in key. So I cannot imagine having to deal with losing one’s physical ability as well as adapting to new social settings and interactions. However, I find individuals that have MD seem to have a better acceptance rate of their new circumstance than people that find themselves disabled due to accidents. As I’ve said above, there are exceptions to this rule but in my small segment of the world, this is what I have observed. Perhaps this can be attributed to the way the support system around the individuals deals with the new challenges. I find that acceptance of one’s obstacles has a great deal to do with personal strength but also support around them.
In closing, because I do not have a disability that I was born into I feel that I could never do what half the people I know in the circumstance do every day. I look up to my family member who is going through it right now. They are one of the strongest people I know and they’ve always been. This is why I know they will get through it. What I don’t understand is how they can say they look up to me because even though we are in the same physical predicament now the way we have both gotten there is completely different.
People have asked me if there was a cure for my disability, would I take it? My answer is not. I would not. At this point in my life, I am at a comfortable stage. I have developed a comfortable series of physical care routines and a comfortable way of dealing with my circumstances. I would not want to go back to being a two-year-old just to be able to walk, run, or jump. One thing I would like the ability to do is to wipe my own butt. Not because it’s an enjoyable task by any means but simply to gain a sense of privacy that is not available to me at this point. However, when I look back on it all I am left with this question...do I really have it all that bad? One, I did not lose anything. Two, if I was an alien looking down and saw someone in my predicament who was having things read to him, food fed to him, his bathroom needs to be taken care of, I would think to myself “these must be the kings of the world!” that’s just my unique way of looking at it. Just some food for thought.
Question: For those who are able-bodied would you rather have it and lose it? Or not have it at all? You can comment
I myself was born with a disability. I have Cerebral Palsy and it is a neuromuscular disability. It is basically like I have the ability to do everything but my brain does not know how to send the signals to the appropriate muscle groups. Due to my circumstance, I have had a long while to adapt to challenges and I have never known what it’s like to walk, even without the assistance of a walker or another person. I have never known what it’s like to work out like an able-bodied person and come home and feel exhausted. I have never even known the simplest pleasures in life such as being able to tie my own shoe. However, this does not bother me because I don’t know what I am missing. I cannot speak for others but in my opinion, it is better to have a disability which limits your functioning from birth rather than experiences both sides of life. I say I cannot speak from personal experiences however I do have friends that have undergone this predicament. I find that these individuals can be categorized into two types of people.
When one has their physical independence suddenly taken away from them it is no doubt mentally training and frustrating. I cannot imagine how my one friend felt when they were just about to go to school for diving and then the next thing they know they found themselves in a wheelchair. They have adapted greatly to their new circumstance and they do not feel society owes them anything because they are not disabled. I know others that never come out of what I have terms “the grievance period.” As I’ve stated many times on this blog before. I go to a college which has a high incidence of people I wheelchairs. The number of people in wheelchairs is equally split among people that have had their disabilities since birth and people that have grown into their disabilities.
Apart from accidents, the most common form of “growing into one” disability is an umbrella of 40 disabilities known as Muscular Dystrophy. There are several common forms of MD but most show themselves during the heart of adolescence. MD itself is a genetic disorder that is not controlled by the birthing process. These individuals are not often cut down at their prime. When social development is extremely fragile in key. So I cannot imagine having to deal with losing one’s physical ability as well as adapting to new social settings and interactions. However, I find individuals that have MD seem to have a better acceptance rate of their new circumstance than people that find themselves disabled due to accidents. As I’ve said above, there are exceptions to this rule but in my small segment of the world, this is what I have observed. Perhaps this can be attributed to the way the support system around the individuals deals with the new challenges. I find that acceptance of one’s obstacles has a great deal to do with personal strength but also support around them.
In closing, because I do not have a disability that I was born into I feel that I could never do what half the people I know in the circumstance do every day. I look up to my family member who is going through it right now. They are one of the strongest people I know and they’ve always been. This is why I know they will get through it. What I don’t understand is how they can say they look up to me because even though we are in the same physical predicament now the way we have both gotten there is completely different.
People have asked me if there was a cure for my disability, would I take it? My answer is not. I would not. At this point in my life, I am at a comfortable stage. I have developed a comfortable series of physical care routines and a comfortable way of dealing with my circumstances. I would not want to go back to being a two-year-old just to be able to walk, run, or jump. One thing I would like the ability to do is to wipe my own butt. Not because it’s an enjoyable task by any means but simply to gain a sense of privacy that is not available to me at this point. However, when I look back on it all I am left with this question...do I really have it all that bad? One, I did not lose anything. Two, if I was an alien looking down and saw someone in my predicament who was having things read to him, food fed to him, his bathroom needs to be taken care of, I would think to myself “these must be the kings of the world!” that’s just my unique way of looking at it. Just some food for thought.
Question: For those who are able-bodied would you rather have it and lose it? Or not have it at all? You can comment
It probably is much easier to not have it at all, then to have it and lose it, just because of the adjustment period. For someone who's had a set of wheels since birth, it's as natural and normal as someone who had to learn to walk. In that circumstance it is not really adapting but just being as functional and independent as possible, which is everyone's main goal regardless of ability status. That being said, as someone who is able bodied, there are certain things in my life I would not have been able to do if I had been exceptional. I wouldn't take back those experiences to avoid the difficulty of learning to adapt even though I recognize how difficult change and quick adaptation is. On the flip side I am sure you have your own set of experiences that are unique, as everyone does, that no one would want to miss out on. I think it is like asking someone if they could go back in time and change any aspect of their life, most people would eventually say no because they would not want to do anything to change a positive outcome.
ReplyDeleteYou and your thought provoking comments. You are always one that got the mind going. I don’t know if I agree with the last part of your comment but the majority of the comment reflects exactly what I said. Great minds think alike. I don’t know how much I want to be able bodied because I know no different life then the one I live. Thank you for your readership and your selfless promotion. It means the world to me!
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