The Third State Has Risen: Literature Foreshadowed It and Now We Are Living It

Whether this blog goes “viral” or even gets read by anyone else is not why I am writing it. Usually, I write to inform or to educate and maybe I will do both with this piece as well, but this time I am writing out of disgust anger, and fear. If anyone asks, I am not shy about giving my opinion about something, and most of my opinions on almost every issue tend to gravitate towards the middle or the left of the political spectrum, but for this issue, I am sure I will piss off some of my regular allies when I say, “what the hell America?” There is a difference between being accepting of others and sanitizing language to erase History and an entire culture’s identity. 

When I originally heard about the change of the name of the agency that runs the program that provides my support services from “the agency for persons with disabilities”, to “the agency for persons with unique abilities” I was angry just like many of my colleagues within the disability community are. That has not changed even though I am writing this blog piece/letter many weeks later. What has changed is the way I view the overall issue as the climax of an issue that has been going on in America since before I was born. 

I believe that the sudden push by those outside of the disability community to erase the word “disability” from the dictionary is the latest and greatest attempt from the third state to erase individuality from society. You might be asking yourself, why do you say that? The rest of this blog will attempt to provide an answer to your question. 

In 1931 Aldous Huxley wrote a little book you might be aware of entitled “Brave New World.” For many Americans, this was required reading material at some point in their primary education. For those who aren’t familiar with the book or weren’t raised in America, I will attempt to summarize the basic idea behind the book. Huxley’s book depicts a Godless world where feelings are suppressed by pills, and nobody is forced to deal with the realities of life. The following quotes encapsulate this idea. 

“And if ever, by some unlucky chance, anything unpleasant should somehow happen, why, there’s always Soma to give you a holiday from the facts. And there’s always Soma to calm your anger, to reconcile you to your enemies, to make you patient and long-suffering. In the past, you could only accomplish these things by making a great effort and after years of hard moral training. Now, you swallow two or three half-gramme tablets, and there you are. Anybody can be virtuous now. You can carry at least half your morality about in a bottle. Christianity without tears- that is what Soma is.  

“Ford we are twelve; oh, make us one’.

Even though Huxley’s book was written 92 years ago it is scary how accurately this book foreshadowed life today. America is now a society controlled by a silent “third” state which infiltrates all facets of our lives including telling us what and how to feel. The latest assault on language is just another way to continue the same campaign of attempting to erase all individuality from the world. Don’t believe me? Here’s further proof.

The assault on language started several years ago when they pressured a football team in the NFL to change their name from “The Redskins” to “The Commanders.” I’m not trying to come off as a racist, I’m just saying, why did the Redskins have to change their name while the Florida State Seminoles' name has been unchanged? In another example, two country music groups changed their names to get rid of their ties to the South. Again, I am not saying that everything that occurred in the South back before I was born was right or just, I am arguing that by changing something’s name to make it sound better or to make a group feel better, we diminish the fact that it happened. Even though our history has dark periods in it, if we do not acknowledge them, aren’t we destined to eventually repeat them? 

You may be asking what history and language have to do with one another and in particular, your argument about the “third state?” My answer is simple. The current push to change the terminology used to describe the disability community is an attempt to diminish or erase their history and culture. I do not say I have a disability; I say I was diagnosed with a disability but there are others in the community who use the term person with a disability to describe themselves. In short, I ask what gives any outsider the right to define a group of people when they do not belong to that group. The answer is simply this. The third state does not want us to define ourselves, rather, they want to tell us who we are or who we should aspire to be. 

In closing, this blog may at first seem less concise than my previous pieces but upon further examination, I believe you will find that not only do I make a good argument about disability and language but that like Mr. Huxley and myself, you should fear what the future holds for us all. 

I Am An Adult Even Though It Is Hard To Believe So Please Start Treating Me Like One

People with disabilities are often infantilized even by those closest to them. 

I am 37 years old but sometimes I feel like I’m twelve. I am currently reading a book with my girlfriend Samantha who I affectionately refer to as my “little alien.” The book is entitled The Woman In Me by Britney Spears. Spears’ memoir talks about her early life as a performer and how much she enjoyed it but it also talks about the conservatorship she was under for thirteen years. During the conservatorship, every aspect of her life was controlled by others. My situation is not as severe as Ms. Spears's, but I can sort of relate to her on some level. 

For those who are new readers of this blog, you may not know that I have a disability known as Cerebral Palsy or CP, or as I like to call it, T-Rex syndrome. I know some people in the disability community will read this and not like the self-deprecating language I use to describe how cerebral palsy affects me physically. Notice how I didn’t say how my “disability” affects me that is due to a change in my mindset that occurred rather recently.  Those who know me know that I’m not the type of person to make a habit out of using politically correct or sanitized language. That being said, I do not believe I am disabled by my diagnoses. I only have “a disability” because society says I do. In a recent conversation with a person from an organization called the Inclusive Hive Community, the question was asked: What are the most common misconceptions about disability.  This question was asked to five or six of my fellow self-advocates including myself. I answered the question first with my typical response, that we are more than our disabilities, however, that was not the most eloquent answer I heard during the conversation. I believe the most eloquent and honest answer came from a friend of mine, Chatequa Pinkston. She said something to the effect (sorry if I don’t get the words exactly right Chatequa) that society doesn’t see disabled people as adults. We can accomplish great feats in the area of education and self-advocacy, but still, we are treated like children. I know that was not a direct quote but it is pretty damn close. If I understand Ms. Pinkston’s point clearly, it is that as individuals with “disabilities,” we are only disabled when people say we are. Ms. Pinkston is a published author, and founder of a non-profit along with many other accomplishments but still drives home the point that “disabled people” are not treated as people first, rather the focus is on our diagnosis first. 

Another member of the panel who happens to be my girlfriend brought up the idea of disability and family and no, in this case, I literally mean disability and starting a family. She argued that we can achieve great goals in every aspect of life but when we express our desire to start a family we are looked at as if we have three heads. In this case, even the ones we love sometimes say people with disabilities should be satisfied just being in a relationship and “playing the cute couple”; why should we want more. To those skeptics and naysayers, I submit the following argument: it is in human nature to carry on and produce offspring. Little kids not only give parents a chance to pass on what they know to the next generation they also give those around them the opportunity to realize what life is all about. 

These two arguments seem unrelated, but I use them to drive home the following point: it is time to stop treating men and women who are in their 30s and 40s as if they are incapable of living a “normal life”. We are living in 2023 not 1823. The archaic views about people with disabilities maturing slower than their abled-bodied counterparts are just not accurate. If we mature at a different speed than our able-bodied counterparts it is because we have not been given the opportunity to grow and develop without being coddled. Whether it is financially or otherwise, disabled people have the right to fail. It is through failure one grows into who they are supposed to be. The only way “disabled people” are going to grow is when people who love and care for them as well as society as a whole stop treating this entire group of people as if we are incapable of taking care of ourselves if we are given the right tools. 

It is time to end this practice, but I know it will take more than just this blog to change the minds and hearts of not only my loved ones but almost everyone else as well.

I know that was a lot to digest and this has been one of my more in-depth blogs of late. Always remember though no matter how heavy the subject matter gets, we as “disabled people” need not let others' perceptions or beliefs derail our overall happiness. 

Until next time, Your Friendly Neighborhood Super Advocate,

Jay

 

Come On America, You Can Do Better

Disclaimer: An article similar to this blog post will be published on FSA Central. 

The practice of paying disabled people below the minimum wage is still legal in 2023, and now It is time for that to change. 

The fact that it is legal to dehumanize and discriminate against people with disabilities this way in 2023 is ridiculous! We are America, we are supposed to be the country everyone looks to as an example but Europe treats its disabled population ten times better than we do. Why is it that just because someone is disabled whether physically, intellectually, or otherwise, it is okay to "throw them a bone"? Does that make society feel all that great?  I'm pretty sure Lady Liberty is crying in New York Harbor and Uncle Sam is disgusted. However, because disabled people have been marginalized in America for far too long and I'm afraid that without a disability revolution, this may never change. It is time for us to stop being good little boys and girls and sitting quietly in our chairs and looking good for the photos and live up to the disability motto “nothing about us without us” because no one will ever give us a seat at the front of “society’s bus” unless we take it.

Below is a call to action put out by the American Association of People with Disabilities (AAPD). As part of an effort to end this abysmal practice please visit AAPD.com and sign the petition to do your part to allow America to truly come into the 21st century. 

ACT NOW: End Subminimum Wages for Disabled Workers!

Support Ending the Practice of Paying Disabled Americans Subminimum Wages

Many disabled workers are being paid far below minimum wage, and it’s completely legal. These policies are based on the idea that disabled people are inherently less productive, and their work is less valuable. This is undeniably false. Disabled workers deserve a fair wage, and we need your help to put an end to the practice of paying disabled workers subminimum wages.  This discriminatory practice cannot continue.

Section 14(c) of the Fair Labor Standards Act allows employers to pay disabled American workers subminimum wages. Section 14(c) leaves room for employers to engage in discriminatory practices which include segregating disabled employees, cutting them off from community settings, and limiting their ability to receive opportunities for career advancement or development.

Research from the U.S. Commission on Civil Rights shows that between 2017 and 2018, the average wage of a person with a disability working under a 14(c) certificate was $3.34 per hour, less than half of the federal minimum wage. Many disabled workers made even less.

The time to act is NOW. The Department of Labor recently announced they will begin a comprehensive review of Section 14(c) to determine the future viability of the program.

Disabled people deserve dignity, and they deserve equal pay. I urge President Biden and Acting Secretary of Labor, Julie Su, to end the practice of paying disabled workers subminimum wages.

This is not the only way you can make a difference. AAPD is also holding a virtual meeting with lawmakers in Washington DC on November 15, 2023, from 5:30 PM Eastern until 7 PM Eastern. I urge you to attend this meeting if her schedule allows you to. We may not all be affected directly by this issue, but if you are connected to the disability community at all chances are you know someone who has been. Take this wonderful opportunity to not only navigate on behalf of the person you know by telling their story, but who knows one story may change things for all disabled people in the United States.

You can register for the next meeting, which will be held on November 15, 2023, from 5:30 PM Eastern until 7 PM Eastern. Registration is now open and will close on November 10, 2023 to registration link can be found on the US Department of Labor’s website: https://www.dol.gov/agencies/odep/14cEngagement

at the bottom of the page, you will see a button that says “registration link,” which is written in fairly small print, which may require those with visual challenges to magnify the webpage. For those who have additional access issues, I have included the AAPD accessibility support email below.

Accessibility support email: jdavidson@aapd.com all requests for accommodations based on disability must be submitted by November 6, 2023

Getting Back At It

Your friendly neighborhood super-advocate is finally back. It has been quite a while since I last posted as my loyal readers will have noticed. The last time I came to you I wrote a post on how to make the voice of the voiceless even louder. While the post got a large number of views, which I appreciate, I want to remind everyone that the best way to follow this blog is to make sure you’re following it on Blogspot. Occasionally I may not post a blog on the Facebook page.

Now that that’s out of the way I wanted to thank everyone for their overwhelming support not only in the past but recently as well. I was afraid that when I promised a new direction for the Voiceless Minority and did not stick with my five posts a week, my readership would suffer. Readership has done the exact opposite. I thank you for your support while I was not feeling well. While this post is on the shorter side, come back next week for in-depth investigations into a variety of topics. On Monday we will revisit one of the most popular topics on this blog recently. For those of you who remember several weeks ago, I did a blog on the Lego company. It specifically focused on adaptive Legos for the blind community. 

The response that that particular blog received has inspired my curiosity. That being said, Monday’s blog will discuss not only adaptive Legos but the concept of adaptive toys in general. Are there other toys out there for people with disabilities, i.e. toys for individuals with sensory issues or those with dexterity issues, or even toys that cater to a particular disability like the Legos do? Let me hear from you so that I can research and address them in future posts.

Until Monday, remember whatever life throws at you your attitude can help determine how the situation turns out as well as how far you go in life, aka your attitude. 

Getting Back To Basics: How Can I Spread The Message of The Voiceless Minority

Your friendly neighborhood super advocate is back with this week’s Spectacular Saturday post. I must begin by thanking you for your overwhelming support for Thursday’s 100th post. Your continued support gives me the motivation, and the ability to advocate even when I am not feeling up to it. I can’t thank you enough for that support. I come to you today with a call to action. The Voiceless Minority is growing. Soon we will no longer be voiceless. Our Facebook page has exploded ever since I started posting five days per week. The amount of views amazes me every day. I am inspired by the overwhelming number of comments for my recent post. Even though I respond to as many comments as possible, some of them are anonymous and not signed by their author. Let’s keep the conversation going and use the power of The Voiceless Minority to further strengthen the voice of the voiceless. There are several ways to keep the conversation going.

Firstly, if you see that I have replied to a comment you made, reply back to me, and let’s see how long we can keep the conversation going. If you are wondering how to see if I replied to your comment read the rest of this blog. It will not only show you how to follow the actual blog on blogger.com but also by following on Blogger you will never miss a post, in the case that I don’t get a chance to put it on the Facebook page. Secondly and perhaps most importantly, if the blog gains more followers, it will bring more attention to not only the blog that I write but also to the disability community and the issues that affect us on a daily basis. 

To follow the Voiceless Minority blog on Blogger follow the steps below

1. Sign in/Signup to Blogger.com which is free

2. For the “Choose Name For Blog” screen you can click the skip button in the bottom left corner if you don’t want to create a blog

3. If you skipped to the next screen click on the lines in the top left corner of your screen if it did not automatically bring you to the next screen.

4. Click the reading list on the left side of the page if it is not on that page already

5. Insert the link for The Voiceless Minority 

        https://thevoicelssminority.blogspot.com/

Before I sign off today, I just wanted to remind you, my loyal readers, that advocacy comes in many forms. One can advocate directly to policymakers whether they have a disability or not. One can read or write literature about disability. One can do the same with popular forms of entertainment. The most powerful form of advocacy is to start a conversation or keep it going by sharing publications or personal stories you may hear. Remember one voice can change the world but other people must hear that voice for anything to change. Enjoy the weekend and look forward to Monday’s blog about another disability-related issue but we will also remember the tragedy that took place 22 years ago in the United States known throughout the world as 9/11.

Till next time, 

Jay 

Breaking Down Barriers: The Architectural Barriers Act of 1968 and Its Significance to the Disability Community

Hello again, yes it’s me your friendly neighborhood super advocate. A warm welcome to all of my new readers who are checking out the blog for the first time. I want to welcome you to a friendly, engaging, informative, and sometimes funny look at anything and everything that has to do with disabilities and the disability community. To all my returning readers, welcome back. No matter which group you fall into, you’ve stumbled upon the Voiceless Minority on a very special day. Yes, it has finally happened after a decade of writing this blog - today marks the 100th post for the Voiceless Minority. I could not have done it without you. I started this blog as an outlet for my anger and the hurt I was feeling after being denied the opportunity to follow what I truly believed at the time was my passion. When I started this blog, I thought I wanted to be a high school history teacher and teach theater after school. I apparently didn’t know myself as well as I thought. They say that “things happen for a reason” or as I like to call it listening to God and actually paying attention to what He is saying by applying it to your life.

Since this post celebrates an important milestone in my advocacy, I felt that it would be fitting to write a post about a specific movement within disability history that recently celebrated its own 55th anniversary. Now that we’ve celebrated the success of The Voiceless Minority, it is time to get back to what this blog is all about, disability advocacy and the disability community as a whole. On August 12th we celebrated the Architectural Barriers Act and its impact on the disability community.  Even though it was passed 55 years ago it still has a great amount of impact on the lives of people with disabilities today. I hope you enjoy the rest of the blog. 

In 1968, amidst the civil rights movement and a wave of legislative changes, President Lyndon B. Johnson signed the Architectural Barriers Act (ABA) into law. This groundbreaking legislation was a pivotal moment in the history of disability rights in the United States. The ABA aimed to eliminate physical barriers that hindered access for individuals with disabilities in federally funded buildings and facilities, setting the stage for more inclusive and accessible spaces. In this blog post, we will delve into the significance of the Architectural Barriers Act of 1968 for the disability community and its lasting impact on the built environment.

Before the ABA, people with disabilities faced numerous challenges when trying to access public buildings, transportation, and facilities. Rampant architectural barriers such as stairs without ramps or elevators, narrow doorways, and inaccessible restrooms limited their mobility and independence. These barriers perpetuated discrimination and exclusion, making it difficult for individuals with disabilities to participate fully in public life.

Key Provisions of the ABA

The Architectural Barriers Act of 1968 addressed these issues head-on by requiring that all federally funded buildings and facilities be designed, constructed, and altered to be accessible To people with disabilities. Here are some of the key provisions that make the ABA an important piece of legislation:

1. Definition of Covered Buildings: The ABA applies to buildings and facilities designed, constructed, altered, or leased with federal funds. This includes a wide range of structures, from government offices and post offices to national parks and military bases.

2. Accessibility Standards: The ABA established specific accessibility standards and guidelines, ensuring that facilities would be designed to accommodate people with various types of disabilities. These standards laid the foundation for subsequent accessibility regulations, such as the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) of 1990.

3. Enforcement Mechanisms: The ABA empowered the U.S. Architectural and Transportation Barriers Compliance Board (often referred to as the "Access Board") to develop and maintain accessibility standards. Federal agencies were responsible for enforcing these standards and ensuring compliance in their projects.

Impact on the Disability Community

The Architectural Barriers Act of 1968 had a profound and lasting impact on the disability community for several reasons:

1. Increased Accessibility: The ABA led to the removal of many physical barriers in federally funded buildings, making them more accessible to people with disabilities. This change greatly improved the quality of life for individuals who previously faced significant limitations in their daily activities.

2. Trailblazing Legislation: The ABA set a precedent for disability rights legislation in the United States. It paved the way for subsequent laws like the ADA, which extended accessibility requirements to the private sector, further enhancing the rights and opportunities of individuals with disabilities.

3. Promotion of Inclusivity: By requiring accessible design in federally funded facilities, the ABA promoted a culture of inclusivity and equality. It sent a powerful message that all citizens, regardless of their abilities, have the right to access and participate in public life.

4. Advocacy and Awareness: The ABA spurred advocacy efforts within the disability community and raised awareness about the importance of accessible design. This activism contributed to the passage of subsequent legislation and the ongoing work to ensure equal access for all.

The Architectural Barriers Act of 1968 stands as a crucial milestone in the history of disability rights and accessibility in the United States. By addressing the physical barriers that hindered access to federally funded buildings and facilities, this legislation laid the foundation for a more inclusive society. It empowered the disability community, promoted equal rights, and set the stage for further advancements in accessibility. As we reflect on the legacy of the ABA, it is clear that its importance to the disability community cannot be overstated, and its impact continues to be felt today as we strive for a more inclusive and accessible future for all.

If you enjoyed this blog, please leave a comment either on this post or on our social media. Even if you don’t accept or agree with all the information presented above, we hope you keep coming back to continue to learn about the disability community. 

Till tomorrow, 

Jay

Parenting Series: How One’s Perspective Can Change Given The Right Circumstances

Happy Taco Tuesday everyone! Thank you for the continued support you have shown over the past few weeks. Today will be the third in a series about parenting with a disability. I did not intend for this topic to be a series of blogs but the topic keeps finding relevance in my life and I hope to continue to impact others as well. 

I began writing about parenting with a disability a decade ago. The first blog was entitled "Who Says We Can't Have A Family". Who Says We Can't Have A Family  Two years later I wrote a second blog entitled “Parenthood & Me”. Parenthood & Me 

If you read both blogs, you may be a little confused. I sound like a rolling contradiction (: Both of these blogs were written while I was single as a pringle. In the first blog, I had a positive outlook on having a biological child. In the second blog, I said something to the effect of after thinking about it I would be doing a disservice to a young child, and I stated that I thought it would be more appropriate if I adopted an older child. Well, eight years have passed since I wrote the second blog and by some strange facet of the universe, or as I like to call it God’s Divine Plan, I am no longer single as a pringle. I have been lucky enough to capture a little space alien named Samantha “Elizabeth” Lebron. Her middle name is not actually Elizabeth. I just gave it to her because she looks just as beautiful as Elizabeth Taylor. (I know Samantha you hate your imposed middle name, but oh well I guess you will have to give me one soon.) Back to my point.  A lot has changed. I now have someone I want to build a life with and hopefully have a child or multiple children with. With that in mind my views on children haven’t changed; they have just gained some perspective. While I continue to believe adoption is still an option, and there a lot of kids out there who need a good home regardless of whether they are disabled or not, my desire to have biological children is stronger now than it has ever been. 

In closing in the first blog, I said that I did not know much about assistive technology for taking care of a child when you are a parent that has a disability. Since the purpose of this blog serves as a resource for everyone as well as to inform people about what living with a disability entails, I plan on researching assistive devices and equipment further and will be writing a fourth blog on parenting with a disability in the future.

Enjoy your Taco Tuesday and come back tomorrow for another interesting blog post from The Voiceless Minority.  

P.S. If anyone has any ideas for upcoming blog posts or wants to be a guest writer please leave a comment below or contact me via email at jasonhahr@gmail.com

Your Friendly Neighborhood Super Advocate, 

Jay  

An Introduction To The Concept of Self-Determination and How It Can Be Applied In Your Life

Thank you for your overwhelming support of yesterday's blog about Braille Legos. Today's post will be a little bit different. Near the end of August, I was lucky enough to be a part of a team that gave a presentation on what is known as self-determination. For those of you who are reading this but were unable to attend the presentation I thought I would write a blog using easy-to-understand language about the concept.

Introduction:

In the journey towards creating an inclusive society, the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation’s principles of self-determination serve as strong examples of empowerment. These principles emphasize the significance of autonomy, choice, and personal growth for individuals with disabilities. Let’s delve into the essence of self-determination and explore its profound impact on the lives of people with disabilities.

Understanding Self-Determination: 

At its core, self-determination encompasses the idea that individuals with disabilities have the right to make choices about their own lives and actively participate in decisions that affect them. This concept champions the belief that everyone, regardless of ability, possesses the innate capability to lead a fulfilling life and pursue their aspirations.

Principle 1: Freedom to Make Choices:

The first principle underscores the freedom we have to make choices according to our preferences, interests, and values. This freedom extends beyond trivial decisions to encompass major life choices, such as education, career, relationships, and living arrangements. Recognizing and respecting these choices helps foster a sense of ownership over one’s life journey.

Principle 2: Authority Over Supports:

Having authority over the types of support and assistance we receive is pivotal for us. This principle acknowledges that each person’s needs and goals are unique, and thus, we should have the power to determine the kind of support that aligns with our aspirations. This approach shifts the focus from a “one size fits all” approach to a personalized, tailored support system. 

Principle 3: Control Over Resources:

Financial independence and control over resources play a significant role in self-determination. Individuals with disabilities should have access to information about available resources and the autonomy to manage their finances. This empowerment helps us plan for our futures and make informed decisions that positively impact our lives.

Principle 4: Opportunities to Learn and Grow:

Continuous learning and personal growth are fundamental to leading a self-determined life. This principle emphasizes providing individuals with disabilities equal opportunities for education, skill development, and vocational training. These avenues not only enhance our abilities but also amplify our voices and allow us to gain confidence and realize our full potential.

Principle 5: Participate in Community Life:

Inclusion within the community is a cornerstone of self-determination. Individuals with disabilities should have the chance to actively engage in social, recreational, and cultural activities, just like everyone else. This principle dismantles barriers and encourages the forging of meaningful connections to lead a rich and fulfilling life. It is only by self-growth and by developing who you are as a person, whether it is in the disability community or otherwise, that you can move onto the final principle which is all about giving back.

Principle 6: The Ability to Give Back to the Disability Community and Advocate for the Rights of People with Disabilities:

In my presentation, I only use 5 principles, but the sixth principle is otherwise known as confirmation. Once you are living the other five principles to the best of your ability it is your responsibility to give back and complete the circle of learning. As people with disabilities, we have a responsibility to learn about our rights and once we have done so, it is our job to pass that knowledge along to future generations of advocates. This could be done in a variety of ways through presentations like the one I gave at the conference, through blogs like this one, or even taking advantage of the times and posting videos on social media.

In conclusion, the principles discussed above if applied correctly, will help us on the path to personal empowerment. Once we empower ourselves and gain confidence in ourselves, we can push for societal change to break down barriers, challenge systematic and societal biases as well and create an environment no matter if you have a disability or not where your dreams and aspirations are honored and supported. If this occurs even in the long term, we will have built a more inclusive and compassionate society.

Thank you for your overwhelming support of this blog. I hope you have an enjoyable weekend. Now I know Monday is Labor Day but advocacy doesn't take holidays therefore neither does The Voiceless Minority. Come back on Monday to not only support the workers of America but start the back-to-school season with a blog that raises an important but not often asked question. "When is the right time to start teaching my kids about disabilities?"

Your Friendly Neighborhood Super Advocate, 
Jay

Florida SAND Fellowship Year One: A Review of How My Advocacy Has Benefited From My Fellowship

Hello again everyone. I hope everyone enjoyed yesterday’s blog on adaptive cooking and cookware. As my fellowship is coming to the end of the contract for my first year tomorrow, I felt it would be appropriate to give a nod to not only Florida SAND but my colleagues and the staff who trained us throughout this past year to thank them for helping my passion for advocacy grow. 

I came into this fellowship at a weird time in my life. Before the fellowship, I had worked for Florida SAND as a per diem writer for their blog FSA Central. While this work kept the flame for disability advocacy alive and on life support, when I was presented with the opportunity to be a fellow, I immediately jumped at it. Thank you to Kelli Munn for the opportunity.  I would not be where I am today without your faith in me. However, my fellowship wasn’t as smooth of a journey as I had hoped. 

About a month into the fellowship, I began to take it for granted. I had an ego bigger than the state of Florida and I thought that I knew everything there was to know about self-advocacy; boy was I wrong! I quickly learned that there was more to this fellowship than just writing articles about people with disabilities. Thanks to the fellowship I would develop event planning skills and meet my best friend, although I did not know it at the time.  We spent the first few months of the fellowship planning a conference where we would teach a concept that I have spoken about before on this blog, “The Route To Self Determination”. At the time I did not realize how this conference would change my life forever. Along with my colleagues, Laura Lee-Minutello and Samantha Lebron we had to give a full-day presentation on the concepts of Route. It was both an eye-opening experience as well as a learning opportunity and as I’ve said before, it was where I dared to hit Samantha with the following cheesy line that would change my life forever.  

Hey, “would you be my scribe for the weekend?”. I don’t know why the hell she said yes but she did. I will not go into further detail about how we have built a relationship in this blog as it is not relevant to my main point. After that weekend I started to see that my passion for disability advocacy was not as strong as others were. Over the next six or seven months it would decline and eventually, in an unforeseen way, it would reach an all-time low. The fellowship quickly became something I took for granted. 

I was given so many opportunities to better the lives of other self-advocates but unfortunately, I did not take advantage of them. Granted, I spent some time dealing with health issues but I did not use my hospital stay to re-energize, instead, I would use it in a negative way and sadly become complacent. However, that all changed a few weeks ago. 

About four months ago we started planning this year’s conference where we would give a condensed version of the presentation we had given the year before. I tried to use this to remotivate myself but it wasn’t until I attended the conference and heard its keynote speaker Matthew Walzer that my attitude changed in a positive direction. Without retelling Matthew’s story, as I have mentioned in previous blogs, I will say that his speech changed my life and my overall outlook on not only my fellowship but my life in general. 

I now understand how things happen for a reason but at the same time, we cannot use negative events in our lives as excuses or crutches to explain away our laziness or lack of effort. Thanks to the fellowship and the speech I heard at the second conference, it became a part of my advocacy work and my enthusiasm has intensified one thousand percent. I now post on The Voiceless Minority anywhere from four to five times a week. This is significant because excluding the first two years in which I started the blog, I only posted on it sporadically. 

As a final thought, just because you start to feel overwhelmed or negative about a particular job or situation you are in, remember that you are the only one who can change the way you feel. Recently I wrote a blog on how attitude is altitude, and it is this principle that is most appropriate to end this blog. In other words, just because there was a period in time where I had negative feelings toward the program, this does not mean that I could not have chosen to deal with them positively.  Negativity is only a feeling; it is only as powerful as we allow it to be. Instead of letting the quality of my work show how I was feeling at the time, I believe God was testing me and unfortunately, I did not pass his test. But you learn from your mistakes and learned I have. 

Whatever you are facing, there is always a way to put a positive spin on it so that you come out of a situation better than before you encountered it. This writer’s humble opinion. Until tomorrow, stay strong. 

Jay

Finding Your Way Around The Kitchen: How Adaptive Utensils Make Cooking Accessible For All

Before I begin, I wanted to say thank you for your overwhelming support of my recent posts. I hope you enjoyed yesterday’s blog on how to have a healthy relationship. Now let’s take a detour and begin today’s post. 

The first thing I want to say is, Happy Taco Tuesday everyone! If you have not guessed this blog is going to be about food and how people with disabilities can be included in one of America’s favorite hobbies, the art of homemade cooking. I know everyone except the really brainy people, the ones who majored in math in college, and hated statistics but here comes one anyway.

According to a poll conducted on behalf of Hello Fresh nearly one-third of Americans still believe it is better to eat in than go out because the quality of food is better. In that same poll, it was reported that 69% of Americans cook on a regular basis, an estimated 10 meals per week. 

Some of you who are reading this may question the validity of this poll and may be wondering what exactly is Hello Fresh. According to their website, Hello Fresh is a meal-kit delivery service with four basic plans depending on your dietary and food preferences. 

If we consider the Hello Fresh poll to be accurate or close to it, then we can logically come to the conclusion that cooking is a highly enjoyable pastime in America. The question can be asked then, how do we make cooking accessible for all? 

Fear not, this blog will attempt to give you, the reader, tips and suggestions on how you can make any basic kitchen accessible for all. To begin, let’s look at why home appliances were created in the first place. I believe Appliance Journal puts it best, “Home appliances were designed to make our lives easier. The cool thing is appliances aren’t a one-size-fits-all all solution. Home appliances come in many different shapes and sizes, there’s something out there for everyone. Preparing meals from a wheelchair is possible with a wide selection of ADA-compliant appliances.” The article goes on to further explain that ADA-compliant kitchens are becoming more popular for three essential reasons. 

1. There has been a significant increase in multigenerational households.

2. People with disabilities are now aging in place rather than going to a facility or an institution. 

3. There has been an increase in the belief that society should be more inclusive for all.

An article written in 2021 by Hadriana Lowenkron reinforces the idea that universal design not only benefits people with disabilities but society as well. 

Let’s look more at the above-mentioned journal. The Appliance Journal has comprised a list of accessible kitchen items that I believe will benefit everyone. 

The first thing they discussed was the height of the kitchen counters. They pointed out that most kitchen counters are 36 inches. They then mentioned how a universally designed home or residence typically has 34 inch countertops. This is useful for somebody like myself because my wheelchair would be able to fit under the counter more easily. After talking about the height of counters the next logical discussion would be to talk about some accessible appliances.

Rather than just regurgitate what the article said about these appliances, I have linked an article here:

https://www.ajmadison.com/learn/appliances/buying-guide/the-best-wheelchair-accessible-kitchen-appliances/

Once you have made your kitchen accessible you can take the next step to make cooking accessible for all. Now we will focus on some adaptive cookware and utensils that may be useful in the actual cooking process. 

The cooking process is fun for most people and if you have a disability, it can be as well. In doing research for this blog, I not only learned about adaptive spoons and silverware as well as straws which I already know a little about, but I also learned about cool utensils such as self-opening kitchen shears ie, scissors for cutting food for when you are preparing it. There is a whole slew of utensils I found on the website below.

https://www.thewrightstuff.com/adapted-kitchen-aids.html. 

In closing, cooking is not only a way to stay healthy, but it can be very therapeutic and relaxing, and given the right equipment, people with disabilities can now cook just like, and dare I say it, sometimes even better than their able-bodied counterparts. 

Well, dinner is done so I am about to go enjoy some of my favorite food, as today is Taco Tuesday!

Your Friendly Neighborhood Super Advocate,

Jay

When You Have a Disability, Is There Such a Thing As Privacy?

As humans, we crave interaction with others. Indeed. when we don’t have social interaction with other people, feelings of despair and loneliness can overwhelm us. However, in the age of social media have we gone too far? Every aspect of most people’s lives is available for consumption by others now. This may be a new concept to the majority of the world but for one segment of the population, I argue that a lack of privacy is not a new concept. Indeed, it may even be a bigger problem for people with disabilities than their able-bodied counterparts. 

Frequent readers of this blog know that I have a disability known as Cerebral Palsy. Cerebral Palsy, for my new readers, is a congenital disability that occurs at birth. It usually occurs during the delivery process; it is not genetic or at least there is no evidence that it is as of yet. There are many forms of Cerebral Palsy and it can affect people in a variety of ways. Some people with Cerebral Palsy have a slight limp when walking, others use a wheelchair for some things but are semi-self-sufficient. Finally, there are severe cases like mine, where the individual is confined to a wheelchair and requires physical assistance for most activities of daily living (ADLs). Cerebral Palsy does not only affect people physically. Indeed some, unlike myself are intellectually impaired. This is not to say those who are intellectually impaired live less of a life, I’m just recognizing the fact that I am not.

 I am aware of how involved other people are in my life, to put it bluntly: I can’t eat, drink, shower, or even use the toilet without the assistance of someone else. Hence the question in the title of this blog. Is there such a thing as privacy when you have a disability? I argue that when you have a disability it is up to you to demand privacy whenever possible. The rest of this post will hopefully provide you the reader, with a new understanding and perspective as to why I feel the way I do.

Before I go much further, let me address the elephant in the room that I know some of you are thinking about. When you first glanced at the title of the post you probably thought it was going to be primarily about sex and intimacy. Yes, that is part of it, but not all of it. I am blessed enough to have, if I may be so bold as to embarrass her for a second, an extremely gorgeous and sexy little alien girlfriend. I count my blessings every day. I consider it a blessing that she not only puts up with my sarcasm and snarkiness but also my complete nerdiness as well as my overly emotional girly side at times. However, this is not the only way in which I am blessed; I also consider it a blessing that I even have a girlfriend. I am aware that most people with disabilities (I know I’m making a sweeping generalization) are single for one reason or another. Some of it is by choice but I believe, and now here comes the annoying opinion again, that most people with disabilities are single because most of the world sees people with disabilities as undatable. This is coming from experience. Yes, even someone with a disability like mine can be guilty of this type of thinking.

Now that I am done doting on and embarrassing my girlfriend, let me get back to my main point about intimacy, sex, and privacy. Some parents who read this next part may not agree with it because they may have a different view on physical intimacy than I do. You have that right and if you choose to, please skip over this part of the post and move on to the non-intimacy section of the article. I believe in every relationship whether it is one that is just beginning or one that spans multiple decades, there is a need and desire for intimacy both emotional, spiritual, and physical. When you have a disability, however, that may look different than the “norm”.  When you have people all around you 24/7 or close to it, it is nearly impossible to have a “private” conversation even if you put in headphones and talk on the phone or video chat while you are apart, or when you are together shutting the door, problems still arise. 

Caregivers or support personnel or whatever you choose to call them are always around and walls are only so thin. Whether you are having a normal conversation or a more risqué one, unfortunately, whether they intend to or not, other people will overhear your conversation. That being said, it is common for all of us disabled or otherwise, whether we comment or not, to form judgments about what we hear and fill in the missing pieces. 

If that wasn’t bad enough, say a couple reaches that stage where they are ready for physical intimacy and they require caregivers, another question arises. How to involve or not involve help? Everyone deserves physical intimacy at some point in their lives, the question is what do you do when you can’t do certain things on your own? Do you not do them?  It is a sticky question that I don’t think many people are asking. “That dreaded opinion again”. Perhaps the reason they don’t ask such questions is because they don’t see disabled individuals as “capable” of being physically intimate. 

Anyway, moving on from the uncomfortable section of this post. As I said earlier, privacy is much more involved than just privacy in a relationship. How does one maintain their dignity if they are “exposing themselves” and every detail of their lives to caregivers or family members? There are some in my life who have recently said to me that there is no such thing as privacy when you have a disability. It took me a while, but I have come to partially agree with them. I argue that even though one may have family or caregivers extremely involved in their lives, it falls on the person with the disability to create boundaries. This could be something as simple as asking the people in your life to announce their presence in some way; knock on the door before they enter the room or give a verbal signal. Finally, another example of a boundary could be not having people speak for you when you have a disability as they often do (these are only two examples of many).

In conclusion, I believe that privacy is relative when you have a disability. Some aspects of your physical care cannot possibly remain private, but there are aspects of your life whereby taking the proper initiative the person with the disability can maintain or restore some of their privacy. 

Anyway, this has been a long blog and before I overdo it and lose the impact of what you have read, I will say good day. I hope you have enjoyed not only this blog but the other blogs you have read this week. More to come on Monday.

One Self-Advocate’s Journey To Redefine the Shoe Industry for People With Disabilities Reinforces a Point That My Dad Has Been Preaching for Years

In Tuesday’s blog post, I talked about a speech I heard this past weekend from a young man by the name of Matthew Walzer. His speech came at a perfect time in my life. As I said in the blog Tuesday, until this past weekend I had been lost and in a sort of never-ending fog. Since Matthew’s story impacted me so much, I thought I would share it and its similarity to a point my dad has been trying to get both me and my sister to appreciate for years. By the end of this piece, you will not only understand the great wisdom of my dad but also you will hopefully appreciate the tenacity Matthew showed in his effort to redefine sneakers for people with disabilities. In short, by the end of this piece, you will understand why I believe in the saying, “Attitude is altitude”. 

Every good story must start with a problem that the protagonist must face. Only this time, Matthew Walzer wasn’t writing fiction. Matthew was born with Cerebral Palsy. While some with Cerebral Palsy are wheelchair bound like myself, Matthew can mostly dress himself. The only problem is up until he decided to change it at the age of 16, he had a problem tying his shoes. Matthew would have to ask his parents to help finish dressing him. Matthew was not satisfied with this. He had dreams of going to college but was worried about being embarrassed, and who wouldn’t be embarrassed, by having their parents tie their shoes in college. What was Matthew to do? 

Being proactive and a forward-thinking individual, Matthew wrote a letter to one of the largest shoemakers in the world. He wrote to Nike explaining his dilemma and after years of development, Nike would come out with a slip-on sneaker which they called FlyEase. Matthew may not have been aware of how his letter would change not only his life but the disability community as a whole, however, his impact is much more than just a shoe. Matthew displays a drive and tenacity that most people wish they had. 

When I heard Matthew tell his story this past weekend at the Florida SAND conference, I was immediately struck by two things. The first thought was holy shit this kid has balls. The second thought was I used to be like that. What the hell happened to that Jason? I used to live by the saying “Fear nothing, Regret less” but compared to Matthew I was falling short. As I said in Tuesday’s blog, Matthew has inspired me to change that, but he has also done what my dad has tried to do for what seems like a lifetime. 

Many years ago my dad told me to not let my disability hold me back from doing anything. At the time, he did not use the phrase attitude is altitude but clearly, that is what he meant. Matthew and my dad are both wise beyond their years. They both understand that our lives are ours to live. They only will be as good or as bad as we let them be. I know I am posting this on a blog related to disability, but Matthew’s point goes far beyond having a disability. Yes, he was born with a disability but besides the fact that he uses crutches to get around you wouldn’t know it. 

The attitude that Matthew and my dad and for the most part, I have, is not very common anymore. But given the state of the world in some people’s opinion, that might make sense. I argue that the negativity and pessimism that we see in a large part of society today regardless of disability, race, gender, or economic status, only produces negative outcomes. If we as a society think negatively, we will not be satisfied with how things turn out. 

In closing, perhaps the epidemic of depression and suicide as well as a feeling of not having a social identity can be simply attributed to the way one looks at life. But I could be wrong. After all, I’m just a 37-year-old Quad who has Cerebral Palsy. However, I believe that what I lack in the physical department, I make up for in common sense. Anyway, just food for thought.

Jay

Florida SAND 2023 REUNITED CONFERENCE RE-ENERGIZES My passion and PROVIDES much needed SPARK For Advocacy

They say things happen for a reason. They also say for those of us who are religious that God has a way of providing exactly what you need when you need it, even if you don’t know you need it. I am living proof that this statement is true. In the following piece, you will learn that one event, no matter how small or big, has the power to change you if you allow God to implement his plan in your life.

For those of my readers who don't know, I am beginning the second year of my fellowship with an organization known as Florida Self-Advocates Network’D (FLORIDA SAND). They are a nonprofit, organization made up of 15 self-advocacy groups throughout the state. The organization aims to amplify the voices of individuals with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities (IDD) on a local, state, and federal level.  According to their website, their mission is… FL SAND is an independent 501(c)(3) organization formed to expand the self-advocacy movement in Florida. It works through the support of local grassroots efforts, legislative platforms, networking with local businesses and civic communities, raising awareness, and promoting inclusion for all. FL SAND provides a united voice on statewide issues and topics that are important to self-advocates and all persons with developmental disabilities throughout the state. 

As a part of my fellowship, I am contractually obligated to plan conferences. As well as self-advocacy training, I am also required to develop an educational curriculum that focuses on self-advocacy. About six months into my fellowship, I started to develop negative feelings toward the whole program. I started treating it like a job that I could not wait to leave, instead of a job I was passionate about. I began to get lazy, purposely waiting until the last minute to complete assignments, however, that all changed after a conversation with one of my best friends who happens to be my sister. 

One night a couple of weeks ago I called my sister intending to just talk about her upcoming baby shower. Yes, I will be an uncle on or before October 12th and I am so excited to get to spend time with my first niece and show her that dinosaurs still exist, lol. Now back to what I was saying. My mom planned a baby shower for my sister during the weekend of August 18th through the 20th. She said she was extremely excited however, soon the conversation turned to me because during the same weekend that she was to have her baby shower, I was to attend the Florida SAND Reunited Conference. As a part of my fellowship, I had to speak at the conference with my colleagues. We were required to give a presentation on what is known as Route to Self-Determination. In short, the presentation centered around the concept of being in control of your life regardless of whether you have a disability or not. When my sister asked me if I was excited to give the presentation and have our dad see me at work, I responded with something like I feel like a fraud… I can’t wait for it to be over. Before she responded to my comment, I was in my head and I believed that I was not living the concept I was supposed to teach. She explained to me that although I am not living the concept 100 percent right now, I am missing the point. Self-determination is about having the ability to live with a disability and also to live the life you want with the proper supports. I was not seeing it this way and instead harping on the part of the concept regarding living life the way you want. I was leaving out a crucial part of the concept ie; the first principle of self-determination having the supports you need and making sure they are the way you want them to be. 

As a result of this reality check, I went into the conference with a positive attitude and I believe this is why God put me at that conference, he knew I was looking for direction in my life and he also knew that I already had it, I just wasn’t paying attention to the signs. Long-time readers of this blog will remember that I have another blog entitled “The Modern Day Moderate”. I have also mentioned that I was a founding member of an organization known as “Access The Vote” which was started by Disability Rights Florida.  Sadly, because of my negative attitude as of late, I stepped away from the organization, however, God figuratively smacked me in the face, and told me I needed to get back involved with the organization when he orchestrated a conversation between me and my friend Laura-Lee Minutello who works at Disability Rights Florida as a part of Access The Vote. She presented me with an opportunity to rejoin the organization and I could not pass it up. I will be attending their upcoming voting summit on Wednesday, September 13th.

Along with the conversation with Laura, the presentation I gave was extremely well received. I am so proud of my fellow fellows for all the hard work and preparation we put into this conference. Thank you for allowing me to be a small part of the team. Even though we experienced ups and downs along the way I think we were exactly the right group of people to give said presentation. I have learned a lot from every one of you. As an added plus I got to spend the weekend and work with my awesome girlfriend Sam. I could not have asked for a better weekend. I also would like to thank Rick Patterson for his tremendous hard work and understanding while not only taking care of me but my dad as well. Thanks, dude, even though we butt heads occasionally I know you are a true friend. 

As a final thought, I want to thank our keynote speaker Matthew Walzer, your speech was inspiring. Don’t worry, I am not going to step on your proverbial shoes and join the athletic wear game. But you have inspired me to write to companies and see if they can create an accessible dress shoe and suit. Thank you for the inspiration.

Okay so I lied, I wasn’t done. The conference inspired me to do what my dad told me I should do when I was in eighth grade. Anyone who knows me knows that I’m good at several things including trivia, comedy, and sarcasm, however, I am as some people say an expert at arguing. I have decided to combine this with my advocacy work and pursue my law degree. I plan on focusing on public policy and civil rights.  After obtaining my degree I will continue to fight for the rights of people with disabilities and underserved minorities so that we can move one step closer to an equal society for all.

Seriously, I’m done this time. Thanks for reading. Sorry for being so long-winded but as the title says, I am newly inspired and felt I had to let everyone know how awesome the 2023 Florida Sand “Reunited Conference” was. 

Until next time…

Jay

The Art of The Casual Lie

Your friendly neighborhood super advocate is back! This time I have a question. Have we reached a point where it is okay to tell a “casual lie” rather than the truth?

You may ask what made you pose the above question. The answer is sad but simple. During a recent follow-up appointment with my pain management doctor, I began talking to his nurse. I have been to the office several times in the last few months because my pain pump needed to be replaced. On this particular occasion, I found it easy to talk with the attending nurse for that day. For privacy purposes, I will not give her name here. 

Throughout my appointment, we chatted easily. She asked me general questions about my education and other topics, and I did the same. As the appointment progressed, it eventually came out that I was a disability blogger. I told her about this blog and mentioned that we had a Facebook page. She seemed genuinely interested, so I invited her to like the page and add me on Facebook. Truth be told, I was not expecting her to do so, however, she immediately responded with the following “Sure I will add you. My name is (blank).” She then preceded to give me her name. After doing so, she said, “Now I post some crazy Crap, so don’t be offended.” I chuckled because I also post crazy stuff as well. The appointment concluded and I went home.

Later that evening, I was on Facebook checking my various accounts and I decided to look her up. While there are numerous accounts with the name she gave me, after looking for quite a while I was unable to find her. Although I expected this from the beginning, the casual way that she

blew me off with what I am sure she thought was a harmless lie got me thinking.

In America today we have become a culture that is dominated by the casual lie. We no longer dare to be honest. If the young lady had no intention of adding me on social media, I would’ve been okay with that. All she would’ve had to do was say “something to the effect of” I would love to, but it is against office policy”.  Instead, to not hurt my feelings she came across as patronizing.

I believe this not only highlights a societal issue that needs to be addressed, but on a deeper level, it brings up the issue of how people view individuals with disabilities. For the longest time the general population has seen those with disabilities as fragile. Several years ago, I wrote a blog entitled” The Protection Complex.” That blog addressed a similar issue that is still relevant today. I believe society views us as fragile because they do not see us as equals whether it’s an individual’s family unit, boss, or during social interactions. People with disabilities are often coddled and are not forced to face the realities of life. You may think I’m reaching, but I believe this young lady blew me off because she thought one of two things. That I was just hitting on her like everyone else does, or, as I believe, she probably saw me as fragile and felt that I couldn’t take the truth. 

Why has the truth become such a toxic thing in America today and especially with people with disabilities? I think the answer is quite simple. Oftentimes, the truth is raw and may hurt, however, if we continue ignoring the truth, we will become a softer and more anxious society. As a final thought, it may be good to try and soften the blow once in a while but by doing so we may do more harm than good.

Anyway, let me step/roll off my soap box for the evening. Hope you guys have enjoyed the read. I look forward to a vibrant discussion about any or all of the issues I brought up in this post. 

Until Next Time,

Your Friendly Neighborhood Super Advocate,

Jay

Disability Is A Mindset Not A Diagnosis

Your friendly neighborhood super advocate is back! Since I last posted a lot of things have happened in terms of disability related issues and content. This post is the first of several posts to come. They will discuss a wide variety of topics including dating and relationships as well as finances and the low expectations society still has for people with disabilities. 

Today’s post will highlight a recent encounter that I had at Wal-Mart. The encounter reinforces the idea that there is still a narrow view of disability in society. Let me set the scene.  

As I often do, I was shopping at my local Wal-Mart a couple weeks ago. Most of the time I go in to the store with my caregiver or I pick up the groceries I have preordered. On this day, I did not go in, instead I decided since I only had a few things to pick up I would have my caregiver run in for me. As most of you know, I currently live in Florida. The weather in Florida often fluctuates between warm and extremely hot in the spring and summer. Rather than waste gas and run the car, my aide and I decided that she would leave the windows down for me. Wal-Mart must have been particularly crowded on this day because it took longer than usual.

While I was listening to music and waiting for my caregiver, an African American gentleman stopped one of the Wal Mart employees who was gathering carts in the parking lot and loudly made the following comment while pointing at my van. “Look at that autistic kid. I don’t think he knows they left him in the car. This is abuse. You should call the cops. It is too f-ing hot”. As this interaction was taking place my first thought was to react with anger. I actually said out loud I do not have fucking autism”. I then thought to myself why are you getting angry? This is typical. After a few seconds I realized if the guy came over, I could use his comment as a teaching moment. Eventually he did approach the vehicle, and proceeded to ask me in a patronizing way if I was okay. Before I responded I took a few seconds to compose myself. 

After reassuring the gentleman that I indeed was okay, I proceeded to inform him that I did not have autism and not all people with disabilities are autistic. He must have been taken aback by my response because all he said was “Oh, glad you are okay. Have a good day”. Once my caregiver got back in the car, I told her the story and we immediately started laughing about it. It was not until later when I told my girlfriend who has the same disability that I do, that she suggested I write this blog. The reason I took a couple weeks to write this blog was because I was having trouble figuring out whether there was a larger lesson that I could expand upon because of this encounter. It was not until last Sunday that the lesson became clear. 

I had not thought about the ignorant comment for a few weeks, and it did not enter my mind until a different caregiver of mine was having a conversation with his friends, and they were surprised that people with disabilities could go bowling. The two incidents made me realize that there is a larger concept that most of the able-bodied community does not yet grasp.

Even though we are in the third decade of the 21st Century and a lot of improvement has been made in the lives of people with disabilities, there is still a level of ignorance and lack of awareness when it comes to disability throughout mainstream society. People either patronize people with disabilities or assume certain things about people with disabilities instead of getting to know us as individuals. If we are ever going to change this, people with disabilities need to be more assertive and this may be controversial but stop feeding into the idea that the majority of society holds.  Most of the able-bodied community assumes that disability equals low expectations. The disabled community further perpetuates this idea when they don’t have high expectations for themselves or each other. 

The statements made in this blog reflect my own beliefs and do not reflect the beliefs of any other individual with a disability. I am not sure how the disabled community will react to this blog as a whole, but it is my hope that all who read this blog will be left with something to think about. People should be judged by what they do, and the impact they make on the world. It is up to all of us to not only be good people but not give others a reason to look down upon us regardless of whether or not we have a disability.

I know this post is longer than usual but I believe it was necessary and just the right length. 

‘Til next time, your friendly neighborhood super advocate,

Jay