Supposed Hero: Not Really, I’m Just Rolling with the Punches--Literally Rolling

So this blog will have no footnotes, no scholarly research. It comes about as a result of the conversation I had today. While enjoying the sunny weather, let me first say that even in Edinboro, Pennsylvania, sunny days are rare in the summer. It is nearly the latter half of May, and we just had snow a couple of weeks ago. So when it is sunny out, I must take the opportunity to enjoy the weather. I was doing so earlier today when a not very unique occurrence happened. 

I met this gentleman named Dan. He was fishing for bluegill in a very muddy Edinboro lake. He was overall a nice gentleman, and we chatted about the outdoors and hunting, feeling in particular. Then we got more into detail about what people do. He asked me where I live, and I told him that I live in an apartment building right up to the street. He then asked me if I was from the area. I responded with, “Hell no! I hate cold weather! I’m originally from Florida but grew up in North Carolina and Maryland.” As most do when I respond that way to that particular question, he gave the following reply, “Then what brings you up here?” I said, “School.” We then discussed how the Edinboro University of Pennsylvania is one of two schools left in the country that provides personal care 24/7 in some capacity. I explained that I don’t use personal care services anymore because I live off-campus, but they help. 

Dan then asked me what I was going to school for. When I told him that I was getting my Master’s Degree, he started a familiar path. He said, “You are so great for what you’ve gone through” compliment. I know that this is not meant to be patronizing and that many non-disabled people could not imagine being in a disabled person’s shoes, but it gets frustrating after a while. For those who are not understanding, I am not downplaying what I’ve done or achieved. I am merely downplaying the role that my disability has played in it. To put it another way, people compliment persons with disabilities for everyday acts like they have done something extraordinary. That would be the same as me going up to a person and approving every time they tied their shoes properly, which some of my friends still have trouble with. 

The compliment is well-intended, but the able-bodied community does not realize that most disabled people do not see disabilities as a disability. They see it as a label that they must overcome. There are hundreds, perhaps even thousands of disabled people that can contribute to society. Fewer are given a chance. Those of us who are granted the equal great opportunity wanted to be that--an equal opportunity. Our accomplishments are made no more significant by the fact that we have a disability. People who may read this may disagree. They might say that I or persons in my situation have greater obstacles to work over everyday pieces. Is my argument, don’t we all? In this case, a basketball player friend of mine will call Lucy an outstanding basketball player. She has just received a contract to play overseas. Which I am very proud of her for. However, many pressure and no varieties put on this individual because she’s tall and overcame cancer. This individual, who is a great person, does not see her overcoming cancer as something special. She sees it as a blessing, and it has given her perspective and has it be her obstacle. It is no different than the single mom going to school with four kids who work for me as an attendant. She has barriers, as well. However, when you are disabled, they no longer become obstacles. They are significant hurdles. My ability to overcome them is no different than my friend Lucy’s or my friend, who works for me. Those of us who are given obstacles in life is given them because we are strong enough to overcome them, and we are meant to overcome them because we are told to test ourselves. Perhaps for something more significant and not to be praised as if we are better than everyone else. 

My point in closing is that everyone has obstacles, whether financially, physically, mentally, spiritually, or other types of hardships. I hope this blog does not sound arrogant or ungrateful because that is my not intention at all. It is merely to show that just because disabled people’s obstacles are sometimes visible, it does not make them any greater or less than anyone else’s obstacles. Blocks are put in place to make us who we are meant to be and not make us stand out as something extraordinary. If we do, that should be by our own doing and not by an obstacle put in front of us. We have no control over.