Beyond the Guilt: Embracing the Necessary Pause

 

I have a question for anyone reading this. Have you ever gotten so involved in a project that you let it consume your whole identity? Have you become so involved that you forget that there are other parts of you that need to be looked after? Ok, I guess that was two questions, but anyway, back to my point.

The last post on this blog was published in November of last year. Up until then, other members of the voiceless minority and I had been posting pretty regularly. However, sometimes we need a reminder that we are not defined by a single thing, or, more eloquently, that we are more than just one part of our personality. I was no different; the universe just had to make more of an effort to make me aware of it.

This post is designed not only to revitalize my own involvement with the voiceless community but also to serve as an update for those curious about why the voice of the voiceless has been so silent since last November.  

Late last year, I started a fellowship with IEEE Spectrum, the world's leading technology and engineering magazine. As part of my responsibilities as a fellow, I am required to research and write stories about technology. What makes this fellowship unique is that, although the magazine is an engineering magazine, the stories they want me and the other fellows to focus on concern assistive technology, particularly technology that benefits people with disabilities. This fellowship has been a perfect transition from my previous fellowship with Florida Self-Advocacy Central.

        Along with starting my fellowship at IEEE Spectrum, I also did this little thing called getting “married”. To any of my detail-oriented readers, you'll notice that I put the word "married" in quotes. I'll explain why in a few sentences. Although I consider myself now married to my best friend and love bug, Samantha, Sami Labron, technically, when you are disabled, and both members of the couple receive benefits from the state or federal government, if you get legally married, you risk losing vital services. That being said, we have the greatest support system in the world. They helped us have an unforgettable commitment ceremony experience.  The commitment ceremony is currently the best alternative to getting legally married. 

Our family did not treat our commitment ceremony like anything less than a traditional wedding. We spent months planning and scouting out venues. In the end, we had what I would consider a magazine-worthy wedding.

While all that was going on, I had a medical crisis, which landed me in the hospital on more than one occasion. Although it seems like the script for a reality TV show, we are actually thinking about writing one, and we are writing it. It was the universe's reminder not to live in the past or the future, but rather to live in the moment because you are never guaranteed tomorrow. 

Now that things are settled, life is teaching me that you must have balance between all parts of your identity. While I do plan on continuing my fellowship with IEEE Spectrum and beginning to write again for this blog, I must leave you with this: live life without limits and do not forget that you are not defined by the circumstances you are given or one aspect of your personality; you are defined by the memories you make and the legacy you leave behind.